You know who it is. I know you guys don’t ever see me here anymore. I’ve been so busy with life and others thing, I decided that I had some more productive ways of using my time than writing up reports for a pro wrestling show. But seeing this whole thing go down with the Benoit family tragedy, I have some things to get off my chest. And I’m sure many of you loyal rajah.com readers are curious as to what happened to tonight’s show so I’ll give you guys the ECW report you know and love. Let’s get on with it.
Show starts with McMahon on screen. He says that last night they had a tribute show to Chris Benoit. Now 26 hours after the fact the details of the horrific tragedy are now apparent. Therefore other than his comments there will be no mention of Mr. Benoit’s name tonight. On the contrary, tonight’s show will be dedicated to everyone that has been affected by this. Tonight’s show will mark the first step of the healing process, and the performers will do that what they do better than anyone else in the world, entertain us.
Cena’s music hits. He comes out to a pretty good ovation and is his usual energetic self. Justin Roberts says that this will be a champion vs. champion match. Styles notes that tonight marks Cena’s first appearance on ECW in over a year. Johnny Nitro, the new ECW World Champion (ugh) now comes out.
Champion vs. Champion
John Cena vs. Johnny Nitro
Won’t get into much detail here. The match goes 50/50, with Cena dominating until Nitro hits one of his spot moves and controls for a bit. Nitro REALLY needs to work on getting some maneuvers in his offense because the man is quite boring as a heel wrestler controlling the match. Conclusion begins when Nitro is on Cena’s back trying to choke him out. Cena backs up into a corner though and breaks the move. Cena hits the Throwback. Cena climbs the ropes and hits his leg drop. One STFU later, and Nitro is tapping.
Winner: John Cena
Excellent way of putting your new guy over guys. Nitro’s first ever match as World Champ and he is jobbed out. They did put him over strong on commentary though, and he held up well against Cena so at least it wasn’t THAT bad.
We see a match up screen graphic for CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke later tonight. It will be a 2 Out Of 3 Falls match with a number 1 contendership at stake. Break.
Back. And here comes the HOT ROD! Rowdy Roddy Piper, and he’s packing QUITE the beer belly. He starts to talk a bit about what’s truly hardcore but here comes Matt Striker. Matt comes out with a birthday cake, that says Happy Birthday Matt. Matt says “Roderick, nice to meet you. I’m Matt Striker, your teacher.” Piper: “My teacher, *looks up and down at him* not my sex education teacher I can tell you that.” Matt calls in a guy into the ring with a cake, and he says today is his birthday. Matt holds the cake. Matt says he is the most well liked guy in the back and the guys wanted to throw him a party. But seeing as how Hot Rod is out there, he would like to share it with him. He says that Piper is his all time favorite and it would mean a lot to him if Piper sang “Happy Birthday” to him. Piper says that he has never let the people down. He thinks that all of them should sing “Happy Birthday” to the mark. “It’s Matt”. “Yea, the mark”. Now Hot Rod, along with the audience start singing “Happy Birthday”. As they get to “happy birthday dear…”, he leans in and asks him, “what the hell is your name again?” Matt starts to say his name and of course, Roddy pushes the cake in his face. As Piper gets out of the ring, the Boogeyman’s music starts to hit. Boogey comes out of the side of the ring, and as Striker runs up the aisle,. Piper pushes him back in. Boogey hits the two handed choke bomb, and of course, drops worms in Striker’s face. Then they replay the events.
They show the graphic again for the main event, and it’s next. That’s good. It means they will get a good 20 minutes at least. Commercial.
I’ve noticed they are not using the “Let The Bodies Hit The Floor” song as they usually do (it’s ECW’s theme music). They are using the “Vengeance” music “Famous”. One would think WWE would learn eh? Last time they used the Drowning Pool song, 9/11 occurred and the Alliance had to stop using it. Now again they have to stop using it. It’s not that good of a song people.
And we’re back. We come back with a vignette for Miz. Now Sazz (Styles and Tazz) talk into the camera. They recap what happened between Nitro and Punk at Vengeance. Nitro is now in the back. Styles asks him what his loss to Cena means and how will it affect his goals. Nitro starts to cough and says that everyone knows that he has a cold and has a high fever. But he was brave enough to go out there and fight. Cena caught a lucky break and it won’t happen again. He says that he will look closely at the Punk/Burke match, and that no one will take away his title from him. Burke’s music hits and he comes out to a commercial.
When we come back Mr. Punk comes out.
Number 1 Contendership
2 Out Of 3 Falls Match
CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke
Won’t give too much details here either folks. Back and forth in the beginning. During the course of the match, Tazz asks, like he does every single week during a Burke match, what the 4-Up on his taped fist means. Styles answers, like always, that it means that at any given time, there can be 4 knuckles UPside your head. The first fall of the match comes when Punk climbs up on the top rope. Burke hit one of Punk’s feet so that he was now sitting on the top turnbuckle. Punk falls forward while sitting so that his back is exposed, Burke, rears back, Elijah Express. 3 count.
Burke works over Punk’s back. 2nd fall comes when Punk falls badly to the outside. He crawls back into the ring before a count of 10, and when Burke goes for the attack Punk scores a quick roll up. Commercial.
Back with Punk being held in a modified surfboard stretching Punk’s back. Punk hits a reverse mule kick. Burke eventually gets the advantage though. Burke goes for his signature hang time elbow in the corner but Punk moved. Punk goes for a roll up but Burke kicks out. Burke hits a hard uppercut and gets a 2 count. Burke runs into the ropes but Punk strikes with a hard elbow. Irish whip to Burke. Burke hangs on, and when Punk rushes Burke kicks him and spins to the apron. He goes on the top rope and jumps off but Punk catches a leg lariat. The two go blow for blows, Punks hits headbutts. Punks with the whip to the corner and he hits his signature knee/bulldog combo. 2 count. Punk is fired up. Burke gets the advantage and tries to throw Punk out of the ring. Punk won’t go though. Burke puts him on the top rope but Punk with some slaps. Tornado DDT by Punk gets a 2 count. Punk sets up for the Go To Sleep but Burke slips out and hit an Osoto Gari (legsweep/clothesline combo) 2 count. Burke lifts Punk up but Punk hits some slaps. He goes for the backfist but Burke ducks and runs for the ropes. He comes back with a sunset flip. Punk reverses and they do the famous roll up reversal after roll up reversal sequence that we saw yesterday on Raw in the Benoit/Malenko match. They finish with the double bridge up and fight for the backslide. Punk turns around though, sets up the G.T.S and nails it. 3 count.
Winner and new number 1 contender: CM Punk
As Punk celebrates, Johnny Nitro comes out onto the aisle and stares at him. He starts to clap. Then he raises his title high over head while Punk looks on. Fade to black.
Now for some comments. I have to say, the past 30+ hours has been a roller coaster ride. After getting so emotional last night watching the Benoit tribute show, shortly after I was exposed to the preliminary facts of the case. I find it so hard to believe. I’m not saying that I think it’s not true or some cover up, it’s just shock. I usually don’t reserve much sympathy for people that do those heinous acts, but I’m still conflicted. The man was undoubtedly one of the best wrestlers ever in the history of the sport. I’ve watched him wekk in week out for literally YEARS. I still have the first Benoit match I saw on tape, against Brad Armstrong in the early 90’s. It is still an incredible match by today’s standards. I can go on and on positively about Chris Benoit the wrestler, but I feel so dirty doing it. I still have a small flicker of hope somewhere deep down that some very, very serious circumstances beyond Benoit’s control caused him to snap, but like I said, it’s a very small flicker. I don’t think it will happen.
What more can I say? I’m not as emotional as when Eddie died because Eddie wore his heart on his sleeve. I felt I knew him better (even though I don’t know much of anything about either). Even though it was more difficult to feel an emotional connection with Benoit, since his character was basically based on a cold demeanor, it still hurts a bit. Pro wrestling a weird ass sport. I don’t think fans of any other genre of entertainment are so emotionally invested or connected to the performers. We see these men and women week after week, for years on end sometimes. Hardcore fans might spend more time with these wrestlers than with their extended family. It’s a very complex and conflicting situation, one I’m not sure I’m going to understand any time soon.
Well that was all I had to say and get off my chest. Big thanks to rajah.com for giving me a medium by which to express these feelings. Feedback to [email protected].
Til whenever I see you guys again, this is xpacnumber1fan signing out.