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Weekend MLS Preview! Hello, is this thing on?

Posted on March 29, 2019

Full slate of games this weekend, starting tomorrow night! Big Western Conference showdown between the Quakes and the Lakes – San Jose thinks they have a contender this year, and Rio Tinto is the place to prove it. On Saturday, the Galaxy go to Toronto in what some people say might be an MLS Cup preview – I tend to doubt it, though, and I'll tell you why. The Dynamo really needed the break something fierce, and they'll try their hand against the Rapids….

….what do you mean, you don't care? This is Major League Soccer! MLS! C'mon! Get with the program here! Try to stay focused!

Anyway, I think the Rapids are really good this year, and they can all but put the Dynamo out of their misery if they take three points. The Red Bulls have a big task in Kansas City-

…yes, the Wizards still play on the baseball field. That will change. Come on, you were all excited about the Red Bulls a month ago! What happened? You guys got ADD, or something? Honestly! Every MLS team is playing! There's something for everyone this weekend! Honestly!

Okay, so. Chivas USA is on a horrible losing streak, but if they're going to climb out of the basement, they'll need to start against woefully inconsistent FC Dallas. DC United goes to Columbus, and that looks like a mismatch, but….

….Look, I said it looked like a mismatch, but this is MLS! Anything can happen!

Okay, the Sunday games you'll be interested in. The Fire and the Revolution hate each other.

No? What about the Sounders and the Union?

I thought those two teams were popular!

Don't you want to hear why I don't think LA-Toronto will be an MLS Cup preview? It's because Toronto's not as good as Columbus. Okay, I guess that was obvious.

Wait! Where are you going?

Wow. So little interest in MLS.

Hm. Maybe that's my headline. MLS IN TROUBLE?
_____________________

You know who didn't believe? Don Garber.

Well, or, he didn't want to burn a perfectly good weekend. Besides, why NOT have a game in Toronto?

And to be honest, if Landon had skied that last-second shot, I'd be pretty motivated to change my soccer interest, too.
_________________________

As Bill reminded us,
_________________________

I'm only linking to this article in fairness, because conservatives are getting toasted for not supporting the Nats, and I wanted to show that liberals could also be tedious about the sport when it suited them. Although one swallow doesn't make a summer – as soon as I read on Deadspin that a lefty scold was trying to spoil our soccer fun, I immediately thought, "Let me guess. Dave Zirin."

My wife, by the way, came up with the perfect nickname for Algeria – The Strangers. Yeah, pretty good, right? She should be doing this.

Yes, I realize there were games this morning. I'll get to them, although at this rate sometime after the Ghana game.

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